


Make My Heart Beat

by yaoicastle



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: #first chapter is bokuaka as children, #it gets great in the end, #natsumeyuujinchou au, #other pairings/characters or tags might be added, #rating will go up to mature or explicit later on, #time skip, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-10
Updated: 2016-06-10
Packaged: 2018-07-10 07:32:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6973279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yaoicastle/pseuds/yaoicastle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bokuto Koutarou is special. He can see Yokai since as long as he can remember and it had troubled him ever since. Until he meets Akaashi. Akaashi Keiji is a yokai and without telling Bokuto that particular fact, they befriend each other. But what will Akaashi do? Will he tell Bokuto the truth or will he leave? And if he leaves...will they ever see each other again? (I suck at captions, give it a try | Natsume Yuujinchou AU)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Make My Heart Beat

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!  
> So this is the very first fanfiction I'm uploading.  
> It is also the very first fanfiction I'm writing about Haikyuu!! and it is also the very first fanfiction I'm writing in english.  
> My mother tongue is german, so I'm pretty anxious about uploading this. If you find any grammar or spelling mistakes, please feel free to correct me. But I really tried with this fanfiction and I hope you like it.  
> Quick explanation: 'Yokai' are monsters and ghosts in japanese folklore, in case you didn't know. You don't actually have to know Natsume Yuujinchou to understand this AU, since I'm going to change a few things and explain everything anyway.  
> Well, I hope you have fun reading and let me know what you think of this fanfiction!

It was a rainy day. 

Winter was over and spring was near, however the sun barely showed itself. The march air was still somehow cold - not that it mattered to Akaashi. Despite the cold and damp weather, he was sitting in his usual spot. It was a big, old cedar tree, standing beside a path that led through several, huge fields, with a river running next to it. It was quiet and Akaashi liked that. The branches were thick, so they could easily hold his weight. Not that he weigh much in the first place. 

His black Kimono, that matched the colour of his messy hair, was fluttering in the wind, but he certainly wasn't cold. He was barefoot and had a belt around his stomach, which resembled the colour of his eyes, holding the Kimono together. Eyes closed, he leaned his head against the tree and enjoyed the sound of the rain, as it pattered against the leaves and showered his face with faint droplets of water. 

Akaashi loved water. It was his element. He loved the sound of it. The feeling of it against his skin. The atmosphere it created, when it poured down from the sky. The smell that nature emitted after it had been soaked in rain. It made him feel alive, even though every fiber of his being reminded him that he was not. He was a yokai - a ghost, as humans often called them. He was not alive, at least not under the definition that the humans had for this word. He didn't have a beating heart, for one, but he could move. He could smile, talk, touch - everything there was to being "alive". Theoretically speaking, of course. 

But the existence of a yokai was a lonely one. Making friends was hard, because everybody was so different. And with Akaashi's quiet and reserved personality, he would surely be alone, even as a human. So he didn't even bother. He preferred to sit in a tree, watch a few humans pass by now and then and otherwise be engulfed in silence. 

However, this silence was soon interrupted as Akaashi heard the sound of wet footsteps. It was barely audible through the heavy pouring of the rain, but it was coming closer with every second. He opened his eyes slowly and soon spotted a streak of silver, as someone slumped down just a few feet away from his tree. 

Under closer inspection, he could see that it was a child. Probably not older than nine years, it was a boy who was clutching his own knees, rocking back and forth, apparently not caring about his clothes getting muddy. With a frown, Akaashi tilted his head and leaned a bit closer. That was when he heard it. Sobbing. The boy was crying while running his hands over his face, probably to get rid of the tears. Not that it was really necessary, since the rain most likely washed them all away anyway. 

Akaashi should've just sat there and let the boy cry, but something told him to move. Swiftly and with a fluid motion, he got off the tree and onto his feet, which immediately got dirty from the mud. He grimaced for a second, before he continued walking towards the human child. As he reached him, Akaashi slowly sank down in a squat and wrapped his arms around his own knees as well. 

Now, that he was closer, he could see that the boy's hair was indeed silver, but with a few streaks of black here and there. 'What a weird hair colour', Akaashi thought, as he continued to further inspect the person in front of him. Suddenly and without the raven-haired yokai expecting it, the crying boy's head shot up and he looked him directly in the eyes. Akaashi's own eyes widened, while he slowly leaned away. _Can he see me? No, that's not possible. He must be looking at something behind me_ , he told himself and just as he wanted to turn around to see if there was anything behind him, the boy in front of him spoke. 

"Pretty..." was the only thing he blurted out and when Akaashi looked at him in surprise, a blush found its way onto the boy's cheeks. No, this was not possible. No human could see him, this was ridiculous. "W-Who are you?" the boy asked next, sniffing a bit and after Akaashi quickly turned his head around to make sure there really was no one behind him, his heart sunk in his chest. This boy was really talking to him. He could _see_ him. But how?

"What school do you go to? Do you live around here?" he wanted to know as he rubbed his eyes, talking loudly in order for Akaashi to hear him over the rain. Akaashi was too taken aback to answer, as he realized why this boy was asking these questions. Akaashi had the human form of a child, probably even younger than the boy in front of him and he sometimes tended to forget about that. Youkai normally did not age, they were just kind of _there_ , but for some reason, Akaashi was one of the few exceptions.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Akaashi wanted to ask why the hell this human could see him, but that wasn't what left his lips. "Keiji," he answered instead, immediately regretting that he opened his mouth in the first place. Why was he telling this boy his first name? And how stupid did that just make him sound? He had been asked which school he went to and if he lived around here and he just blurted out his name, still baffled by the fact that the boy could see him to begin with. However the boy who was a crying mess just a second ago didn't seem to be bothered by that.

"I'm Koutarou. Bokuto Koutarou," he introduced himself and tried to force a smile, which didn't quite reach his eyes. For some reason, and Akaashi could really not explain why, he felt concern. The boy named Bokuto - he was for sure not calling him by his first name, not even in his thoughts - was crying just a second ago after all and there had to be a reason for it. 

"Did something happen?" Akaashi asked with a quiet voice and soon was afraid that he had been too quiet, because Bokuto wasn't answering him, when suddenly the silver-haired boy averted his eyes and bit his bottom lip. 

"It's nothing. Just some stupid boys from school," he muttered and Akaashi frowned in response. Bullying? He had seen it a few times and he honestly thought it was disgusting. Why go out of your way and make an effort to insult another person and make them feel bad? There were some things Akaashi could not understand about humans. 

The yokai hummed in response and as he was thinking of an answer to come up with, Bokuto apparently noticed his appearance. "Hey, why are you wearing a Kimono? And why are you not wearing shoes? It's cold!", he exclaimed and the concern in his voice made Akaashi's non-beating heart flutter. Why was this child that he didn't even know concerned about him? But then again, he had just been concerned about Bokuto a second ago as well, so he probably shouldn't say anything about it.

Since he didn't really know how to explain why he was wearing a Kimono and why he was barefoot, especially when it was raining outside, Akaashi just chose not to try. 

"But I'm not cold," he answered instead and watched with a frown as Bokuto suddenly stood up and grabbed him by his hands, only to pull him up from his squat. Akaashi swayed for a second and had to take a step towards the other male in order to stay on his feet, but Bokuto didn't even give him the time to react. Instead, he just pulled him along as he started running into the direction he came from. 

"W-What are you doing?" the yokai wanted to know, yelling over the sound of the rain, but Bokuto didn't bother to reply. It came to Akaashi's mind that he was, indeed, a yokai - something he had forgotten for a second - and that he could easily pull away from this human child, but for some reason he didn't. As much as he didn't want to admit it, this was thrilling. He could be seen by a human, which was something he had never experienced before. And this human showed interest in him, without knowing that Akaashi himself was not human. 

They continued running for a few minutes until Bokuto came to a stop at something that looked like a bus station. Akaashi looked around nervously, hoping that they wouldn't cross paths with another human, because his identity would be exposed then. A voice in his head told him to keep it a secret that he was a yokai, although he didn't know why. He should not care, right? He shouldn't care if Bokuto would be scared of him afterwards or if he would stop grabbing his hand like he did now. But he did care. He cared about this person who he'd just met, because no one had ever grabbed his hand like this. He had been alone for such a long time and he was always telling himself that he didn't mind, but sometimes he could feel his chest tighten when he saw two people touching, or laughing together. Maybe it was okay to be selfish for just one day.

Bokuto gently pulled him under the tiny roof, which protected the small space under it from the rain, before he finally let go of his hand. Wooden walls surrounded them, so it wasn't nearly as cold anymore and Akaashi just stared at his silver-haired companion, still in surprise over what had just happened. 

"You said you weren't cold, but that's not possible when it's raining like that, right? Because I was cold, so I thought maybe you were saying things you didn't mean. I hear people do that a lot, you know? Saying things they don't mean or not saying what's on their mind. I thought maybe you are that kind of person," Bokuto explained, even though Akaashi had not asked anything and again, the yokai was baffled. What was this child's deal? Why was he worrying so much? 

"So, do you live around here? I've never seen your face anywhere," Bokuto continued to chatter and it was like he had completely forgotten about the fact that he was bawling just a few minutes ago. His eyes were still red, but the radiant amber colour stood out a lot more than before and it captured Akaashi for a moment. That was, until he remembered that he'd just been asked something. 

"I just moved here recently," he replied hesitantly and could not pinpoint the reason why he was lying to this boy. Bokuto hummed in response and shoved some of his damp hair out of his face, which was so long that it was reaching his eyes. "Why are you so concerned about me?" was Akaashi's following question before he could hold it back and now it was Bokuto's turn to look at him in surprise. "You were too, right? You squatted down in front of me when I was crying. Isn't it normal to worry about others?" he replied with so much honesty in his voice, that Akaashi swallowed down his _I only squatted down in front of you, because I thought you wouldn't be able to see me'_. 

"Not about people you don't know," he muttered and averted his eyes, to which Bokuto only smiled. "Don't you think the world would be a better place if people worried about each other more?" he wanted to know and Akaashi parted his lips, but couldn't come up with a reply. A few seconds passed by, where the only sound consisted of the rain pattering against the roof, before the raven-haired yokai spoke again.

"Do you want to tell me why they were bothering you? Those boys in your school, I mean," he inquired and asked himself at the same time why he cared about this matter to begin with. 

Bokuto's smile began to fade and it was his turn to avert his eyes, while shifting from one foot to the other. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you. Everybody thinks I'm sick when I tell them. I don't want you to think I'm sick, too," he mumbled and the pain in his voice made Akaashi's chest hurt. "I won't think you're sick," he promised and he meant it. How could he ever judge somebody without knowing them? Although he had an inkling to what it was that Bokuto was talking about. If he could see Akaashi that must mean that he was able to see other yokai, too. And as a child, he surely told somebody about it.

"Maybe some other time, alright?" Bokuto replied, his voice getting louder again and a smile forming on his lips. Akaashi decided to let the topic drop - who was he to force someone to talk about something they didn't want to talk about? - and instead just directed his gaze towards the fields, watching as the rain drowned them in water. 

They stood there for a while, simply listening to the sound of the rain, when Bokuto suddenly jumped, which made Akaashi wince in surprise. "Crap!" he blurted out and quickly slapped his hand over his mouth, like he was not allowed to swear, which made a smile tug on the corners of Akaashi's mouth. 

"What's the matter?" he wanted to know, trying to hold back said smile, while Bokuto glanced down at the watch around his wrist. "I'm late! I totally forgot about the time. You should better go home too, or your parents will get worried!" he advised the yokai and Akaashi only bit his lip in response. 

He knew that he didn't have parents that would worry about him, but there was no need to inform Bokuto about that. The silver-haired boy seemed hesitant about something as he was looking down onto the ground, when Akaashi realised that he was looking at his bare feet. "You'll catch a cold if you run around like that. Here, I'll give you my shoes. It's okay, I have my socks and my house is not far from here," Bokuto decided by himself, not even giving Akaashi the opportunity to decline, because he was already kicking his shoes off his feet. "See you soon, okay? Bye, Keiji!" 

And with that, Bokuto took off into a sprint, before Akaashi had the chance to open his mouth. Something about the way the other male had said his name made Akaashi shiver and as he looked down onto his hand, it was almost like he could still feel the warmth of Bokuto's fingers around his own. 

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The next day came quickly and Akaashi sat in his usual spot, but today with something being slightly different than usual. He was wearing his black kimono, just like yesterday, but now he was clutching shoes in his arms. Bokuto's shoes. Akaashi didn't really know why he took them with him, but he felt bad leaving them at the bus station, after Bokuto had gone through the effort of taking them off and thus walking home with just his socks on. 

The whole night he had been thinking about this strange human boy. How was it possible that Bokuto could see him? Why was he being nice to a complete stranger? Why exactly had he been crying? These kind of thoughts had been racing through his head since yesterday and it bothered him. Akaashi just wanted to forget about the past day, but somehow he couldn't manage to. And what was he supposed to do with those shoes now? What if he never saw Bokuto again? 

However, something deep down inside of him told him that he was going to. And he hated himself for liking that hopeful thought. 

It was around the same time as yesterday when Akaashi caught sight of something out of the corner of his eye. Yes, he was watching his surroundings, because he couldn't help being curious. Usually he just slept to make the days pass by quickly, or at least rested with his eyes closed, but today he was wide awake and watching - waiting for something. or rather _someone_ to happen. 

It was then that he spotted Bokuto, who seemed like he was searching for something as he slowly approached the tree. Akaashi bit his lower lip in anticipation and he could feel himself wince, because apparently Bokuto had spotted him, too. The silver-haired boy smiled at him, beaming with new energy as he shoved his hands down his pockets. "What're you doing on that tree, Keiji?" he shouted at him, probably because Akaashi was sitting on a branch that was quite high. Oh, sitting in trees wasn't something humans normally did, right? 

Akaashi slowly climbed down, still clutching the shoes to his chest, until he reached the ground where he was immediately approached by Bokuto. "Your shoes. Thank you for lending them to me yesterday. I hope your parents didn't get mad at you," Akaashi responded and handed them over, ignoring Bokuto's question just like he did yesterday. The other boy only chuckled and accepted them, shoving them into the bag he was carrying a second ago. 

"They didn't. I said a friend needed them and that I would get them back, so they dropped the topic," Bokuto informed him and something in Akaashi's chest jumped. _Friend_.

"I see," Akaashi replied with a hum and watched as Bokuto slumped down against the tree. It had stopped raining last night and the sun was shining, so it was a much nicer scene to have a conversation in. Akaashi also noticed that Bokuto's hair was different. Yesterday, due to the heavy rain, it had been damp and messy, almost covering his eyes because it was so long. Today it was styled upwards and Akaashi almost smiled at how clumsily it was done, standing off in different directions. 

"You're wearing that Kimono again," Bokuto noted as he pulled something resembling a Bento out of his bag. "I like this Kimono," Akaashi stated matter-of-factly and at least that wasn't a lie. Although it was not like he had much to wear otherwise anyway. "It suits you," Bokuto admitted and another blush crept onto his cheeks. Akaashi swallowed down the lump in his throat and only smiled in response, as he found it hard to come up with an answer. He had never been complimented before. How does one react to that?

"Do you want to share?" Bokuto wanted to know and it took Akaashi a moment to understand that he meant the Bento in his hands. The yokai shook his head and slowly kneeled down next to his companion. 

"You don't talk much, huh?" Bokuto continued with a grin and opened his lunch box, his eyes radiating excitement as he spotted the food inside. "And you like to talk," Akaashi replied, his words a statement rather than anything else. 

Bokuto however seemed to take it as something else, because his grin faded and he kept quiet for a moment. "Sorry," he muttered after a while and Akaashi immediately regretted his choice of words. "N-No, I didn't mean...I didn't mean it as a complaint. It's nice. I don't get to talk to a lot of people," he quickly said and was instantly angry at himself for saying more than he intended to again, just because he didn't want Bokuto to get hurt for some reason. 

Even so, those were the words that Bokuto wanted to hear, because he quickly lifted his head and shot Akaashi a wide grin. "That's great, because I do talk a lot. Don't you talk to your friends?" he wanted to know as he picked up his chopsticks and started shoving little octopus-shaped sausages into his mouth. Akaashi chewed on his bottom lip, before slowly shaking his head. "I don't really have friends," he added as a reply and Bokuto looked at him in surprise, mouth full, until he smiled again. "Me neither! We can be friends then."

Akaashi didn't agree, but apparently he didn't need to, because Bokuto looked pretty satisfied with himself. He continued to eat, with a few grains of rice sticking to the corners of his mouth, but Akaashi didn't say anything about it. It was kind of cute and he immediately wanted to punch himself for allowing the word 'cute' to enter his mind in relation to Bokuto. 

They sat there in silence for a moment, the only sound coming from Bokuto who was chewing his food with a happy expression. "Do you go to my school? I go to Fukurodani, by the way," Bokuto started to talk again, after swallowing his food and Akaashi was hit with a realization as he heard the word "Fukuro". Bokuto, indeed, kind of resembled an owl. That thought made Akaashi smirk against his will and Bokuto's eyes widened curiously in response. "What's so funny?" he wanted to know and Akaashi quickly shook his head, wiping the smile away with the back of his hand. 

"Nothing, sorry. And no, I don't go to your school. I go to a school in another town," he lied, hoping that it would sound somewhat convincing. "Mhm. Why are you living here then?" Bokuto further inquired and Akaashi bit down on his tongue. "My parents found a house that was affordable here, so we moved in. It's not that bad, since my school isn't far away from here," Akaashi replied and was honestly surprised at how easy these lies were leaving his lips. Why was he lying in the first place?

They chatted on for a bit, with Bokuto being the active part of the conversation, even though he was the one eating his lunch in the meantime. They talked about what animals they liked best (Akaashi's answer being "Cats", while Bokuto exclaimed "Owls!") and Bokuto went on about his family, his favourite TV shows, what food he liked the most and so on. 

Honestly, some people would've probably said that Bokuto was noisy and a bit too energetic, but Akaashi liked it. He was not one to talk much anyway and it was nice to listen to somebody just ramble about their life. Akaashi hadn't had a conversation in what felt like forever and he could honestly use the company, even though he didn't like to admit it. 

"Listen, we've got a really cute cat at home. Do you want to come and see her?" Bokuto interrupted his ramble and grinned at Akaashi, which made the yokai's heart drop. He couldn't possibly do that. If he visited Bokuto's home, it would be exposed that he was a yokai and for some reason that thought scared him. "Sorry, my parents are kind of strict and I think I should go home soon," Akaashi answered instead and Bokuto pouted for a second, but smiled at him soon afterwards. "That's fine, I should go now, too. See you tomorrow, alright?" Bokuto replied as he stood up and Akaashi couldn't bring up the will to decline. 

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The following weeks consisted of a routine that Akaashi and Bokuto quickly established. Every day after Bokuto finished school, they would meet under the old cedar tree and spend their time together. Sometimes they just talked, or played in the river. Sometimes Bokuto would share his lunch with Akaashi and Akaashi would take him to quiet places only he knew of. Obviously they were always alone, since Akaashi would've been exposed if they crossed paths with another human. 

At one point, probably a week after they had first met, Bokuto had told Akaashi what made the boys in his school bully him. Bokuto was, as Akaashi had suspected, indeed able to see yokai. He had been so nervous when he told Akaashi about it, like he was expecting the raven-haired boy to think of him as repulsive or sick. But Akaashi had only looked at him and said three simple words that made Bokuto's eyes beam with relief. "I believe you."

Akaashi was also careful not to run into yokai when he was with Bokuto. After all, he could naturally see yokai too and if they would encounter someone of his kind, they would easily be able to tell that Akaashi was a yokai as well. But despite him having to be careful, he had fun. A lot of fun, actually. Bokuto was such a fun person to be around, he made Akaashi smile so easily that it felt like they knew each other for years, not only for a couple of weeks. The way Bokuto wrapped an arm around Akaashi's shoulder, or grabbed his hand or leant against him while walking. It seemed so natural - like it was _meant_ to be. And that fact alone made Akaashi's chest tighten, but in a good way. 

His affection towards Bokuto grew so naturally that he didn't even notice it. The way their hands bumped together when they walked next to each other or how their gazes lingered on the other person for a moment too long. It made Akaashi's stomach tingle and his skin burn, but he liked it. And at the same time, he was afraid of it. Bokuto didn't know that Akaashi was a yokai and Akaashi knew very well that he only had two options. Either he told Bokuto the truth and risked losing him, since he had been lying to him all this time...or he could vanish. He could just disappear without a word and leave Bokuto behind.  
Either way, it meant disturbing their peaceful and at the same time thrilling relationship and that thought made Akaashi's stomach turn.

And so the weeks passed by, with Akaashi changing nothing about their situation. Until one day, something did change. Bokuto and him had agreed to meet under the old tree like they did every day, but Bokuto was late. After a while, Akaashi began to fidget, because he was getting nervous. Quite some time had passed and normally Bokuto was never this late. Akaashi couldn't exactly go to his school and search for him, so his only option was to stay put.

At some point, Bokuto finally came, but Akaashi's heart immediately sunk in his chest as he spotted his friend. Tears were streaming down his face and his shoulders were shaking, while he wiped his nose with the back of his hand to keep the snot from coming out. Akaashi instantly rushed towards him and placed his hands on his shoulders, while Bokuto continued sobbing. "Koutarou, what happened?" Akaashi asked with concern in his voice and a frown on his face. Oh right, he was calling Bokuto by his first name now, because the boy had pestered him about it for so long, until he had finally decided to give in. 

Bokuto didn't respond but instead only kept crying and Akaashi slowly guided him towards the tree, where they both slumped down onto the ground. It took Bokuto a few minutes to calm down, while Akaashi had his arms wrapped around the other boy. When the sobbing slowly subsided, Akaashi pulled away from the embrace and kept his gaze fixated on Bokuto's face. 

"What happened?" he asked once more and already had a feeling that it had something to do with those stupid bullies from school. 

"They're assholes," Bokuto muttered and rubbed his eyes, while Akaashi kept quiet and waited for him to continue. "You know, they left me alone for a while now - those boys from my school. But today they were bullying this boy from my class. But it wasn't about the boy himself, it was about his brother. His brother apparently likes boys - you know, likes likes - and they were bullying him about it, saying things like his brother was disgusting and he was going to get sick, like it was a disease or something. I stepped in and asked what was so wrong about liking boys instead of girls and then they started to come after me. Throwing trash at me, saying that I was disgusting as well and a faggot. They kept insulting me, so I ran. That's why I'm late," Bokuto quietly explained to him, while keeping his gaze on the ground.

The look on his face was just like the one he wore when he told Akaashi about him being able to see yokai. Like he was afraid of Akaashi pushing him away or thinking that he was disgusting. But Akaashi only looked at him and scooted closer in order to slowly wipe away his tears. 

"There is nothing wrong with liking boys instead of girls," he replied with a soft voice and Bokuto lifted his head, looking at him with widened eyes. "You think so, too?" he wanted to know and Akaashi nodded, practically seeing the relief wash over his best friend. "Why are they so mean about it, if it's not wrong?"

Akaashi kept his mouth closed, while thinking about an answer. He had never understood why some humans cared about this matter so much. To yokai, gender didn't matter. It should be the same in the human world. "Because they are ignorant. Maybe they are scared of it, because they're not familiar with it. Either way, they're idiots. It shouldn't matter if you like boys or girls and you shouldn't listen to them. It's important what's inside someone, not what gender they are. If your heart tells you it's okay, then it's okay," he replied with a calm voice and Bokuto smiled at him, like he often did whenever Akaashi lifted his spirits.

"So wise, Keiji," he teased him with a soft voice and Akaashi smiled at him as well. "But I think you're right. It's okay to like boys," Bokuto continued and closed his eyes, before leaning against Akaashi's upper body. Akaashi wrapped his arms around him out of habit and something about Bokuto's words made his stomach tingle again. 

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Bokuto was acting weird. Not the kind of weird that Akaashi would normally associate him with, but a different kind of _weird_. Ever since their talk about liking boys instead of girls, Bokuto had been avoiding him, or at least that's what Akaashi felt like. 

A few days after that incident, Bokuto had told him he couldn't meet him after school, for the first time in _weeks_. Akaashi had been suspicious, but kept quiet about it. However, he noticed it. The way the distance between them grew larger when they walked together, or the way that Bokuto would wince whenever their hands touched. 

It made Akaashi's chest hurt, but this time in a bad way. He was becoming insecure around Bokuto and he hated it. Being around Bokuto had been so natural the past weeks, like it was the only right thing to do, but now it was awkward. There was a tension between them, which Akaashi could not explain. 

It was a nice afternoon when they met again. The sun was shining and they were sitting under the old cedar tree as usual. It was then that Akaashi decided to say something about it. "Have I done something to upset you?" he wanted to know with a quiet voice and Bokuto looked at him in surprise. "What do you mean?" he replied, looking like he actually had no idea what Akaashi was talking about. 

"I mean _this_ " Akaashi continued and gestured towards the unusual space that was between them. Normally, when they were sitting together, their shoulders were pressed against each other and they were constantly touching. Now there were probably about 12 inches between them. 

Bokuto seemed to understand what Akaashi meant and quickly averted his eyes. "You're clearly avoiding me. If I've said or done something to upset you, please tell me so I can-"

"No!" Bokuto quickly interrupted him and strongly bit his lower lip. "You...It's not like that."

"What is it, then? You know you can talk to me," Akaashi replied with a firm, yet soft voice. 

"I-I can't, not about this," Bokuto retorted with a quiet voice, gaze still lowered to the ground. "You won't want to be friends with me anymore if I tell you."

"Koutarou, that's nonsense and you know that," Akaashi answered back and took one of Bokuto's wrists into a soft grip. "Please, tell me. I'm concerned."

Bokuto slowly lifted his gaze and stared into Akaashi's eyes for a while, before he lowered his head again and whispered something under his breath that Akaashi could not understand. "What? I couldn't hear you, Koutarou", Akaashi said with a calm voice and Bokuto's head shot up again, blushing furiously. 

"I like you!" he blurted out and Akaashi's eyes widened at the loud statement. 

"But...I like you, too, what's the prob-" Akaashi started talking, but quickly stopped when he finally understood what this was about. Bokuto _liked_ him. 

They were quiet for a moment and Bokuto's cheeks grew redder with every second, while he looked down at his wrist like he was expecting Akaashi to let go. But Akaashi didn't. 

"Koutarou, look at me," he demanded with a soft voice and Bokuto obeyed, which left them staring into each other's eyes. They were just staring, amber meeting grey, for a few seconds. Or was it minutes? Akaashi could feel his skin prickle, while his stomach started tingling again and he couldn't find the strength to say what was on his mind. Neither of them said a word, when they suddenly moved at the same time. 

They closed the space between them, lips crashing together, noses bumping into each other as they met in a clumsy kiss. For both of them it was the first time, obviously, so there was no way it could've been perfect. But then again, it _was_ perfect. The way their lips moved against each other and the way their hands found each other, intertwining their fingers together. It was perfect on so many levels and it made Akaashi feel things which he thought he wasn't capable of feeling. 

They withdrew from the kiss, blushing madly, staring into each other's eyes again. "I like you, Keiji. I like you so much," Bokuto whispered, but it sounded a lot happier than before. So happy that it made Akaashi shiver. "I like you too, Koutarou," he replied with a soft voice and smiled. Bokuto smiled back and their lips met again, just as clumsy as before. 

They stayed like this until it got dark. Foreheads pressed together, lips meeting now and then, holding hands for hours. It was beautiful and so pure, that it made Akaashi want to cry. This was love. He was in love with Bokuto Koutarou and when the realization hit him, he wanted to scream. What had he been thinking? He was immortal, not even human and he allowed himself to fall in love with Bokuto? He allowed Bokuto to get attached to him, even though he knew very well that he'd end up hurting him. He ended up being selfish not for a single day, but for weeks. And he hated himself for that. 

When it eventually got dark, they stopped holding hands, stopped pressing their foreheads together and stopped letting their lips touch. They stood up and parted ways, with Bokuto wearing the widest and happiest grin he had ever shown Akaashi. And Akaashi had to keep this grin in mind, because it would be the last time that he would see it.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, what a long ass chapter.  
> I actually didn't intend to make it this long, but whoops. Happens.  
> I really enjoyed writing Bokuaka as children though and I hope you forgive me for the cliffhanger at the end ;)  
> The story will obviously be continued in the next chapter and we're going to meet some of the other characters.  
> I'm really curious about your opinions, so feel free to leave me comment.  
> I hope you enjoyed it and see you next time!


End file.
